If I had spoken to my parents...

“If I had spoken to my parents the way some children do now, I wouldn’t be here to share this status.  Some children need to learn the meaning of respect.”

This is a saying that I see on Facebook quite often these days.  Well, I understand that we have a lot of children (and adults!) that don’t have respect for others…but, respect is something that parents should teach their children from day one.

The thing I try to remember when I see folks acting in this manner, is that they are, more than likely, doing exactly what they’ve been taught.

Train up a child in the way and when he is old, he will not depart from it.  Proverbs 22:6

Yikes…and we wonder what is wrong with society today!  We now have generation after generation who don’t know God.  I can tell you that I have absolutely no idea how far back I would have to go in my family to find someone who actually knew the Lord and lived out a Christian life.  Even now, excluding my immediate family, I can count those who are saved on one hand!  That is a sad truth!

When I see situations like this, I know that there’s nothing I can do at that moment in the natural…so I simply pray for people.  I pray that God would intervene in their lives and draw them to Himself.  I feel sorry for the children…they’re only imitating what they see.  They don’t know any better.  And, the parents are probably imitating what they saw growing up and so on and so forth.  Unless one is drawn out of that behavior and makes the choice to stay out of that behavior, this pattern can go on and on for decades, if not centuries in families.

Yes, it’s a shame to see the disrespect in our society today, but there are things we can do.  We can get involved in our schools, churches, children’s activities, etc.  Even if we help only one person, that persons’ life could be changed forever.

I encourage you to pray first and then if led to do so, get involved. 

Check out this minute long video that I just happened upon while in the midst of writing this piece.

As iron sharpens iron...

A while ago, I found myself continually in a situation where a few of the folks I was visiting with always made me feel as though I could not be myself in their presence.  Every word I said was scrutinized, criticized and I was told what I should and should not do.  Now, this was supposed to be a leisurely visit!  I found myself just sitting there, rarely joining in on conversations.  After a great deal of time in this situation, I found it absolutely necessary to exit the group.  I had wanted to exit long before I did, but I had felt guilty.  But the truth of the matter is, I had to do what was best for myself in this situation.

It’s not that I didn’t care for these folks, because I did...or I wouldn’t have stayed connected for as long as I did.  It’s just that this particular situation turned from a fun, leisurely time to a very unhealthy situation every time we got together…for me at least!

It’s important that we’re careful about who we let into our inner circle.  You’re only going to rise as high as those who are around you.  And, if those around you are continuing to learn and grow in the Lord like you are, then that’s great…if not, move on!

As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens the countenance of a friend.  Proverbs 27:17 

Just as one has a negative attitude towards life, if you stay around that person long enough, that person will bring you down as well. 

It’s all about making the proper choices.  Yes, it was difficult for me to walk away, but I can tell you now, it was one of the best decisions that I’ve ever made.  Well, you say…”the Bible says to love your neighbor as yourself.”  Yes, you’re right!  I can tell you now, if these folks came to me in need, I would do what I could to help them.  I do love them.  I just didn’t need to be in their company for my own well being.  There’s nothing wrong with that.  It’s not the first time I’ve had to make a decision like this and it probably won’t be the last time either. 

Make sure that you’re taking care of yourself in a healthy way and don’t let guilt rule your decisions for a healthy lifestyle.    

So, I grew up in a family where the words...

So, I grew up in a family where the words “I love you” were never spoken.  One day someone asked me how I knew that my parents loved me if they never spoke it out to me.  I honestly didn’t know how to answer that question.

True love became real to me when my son was born.  From that point on, I understood what it meant to be loved and to love someone very deeply and unconditionally.  I will never forget that day! 

After that, it was very important for me to express my love to others.  Even as Nicholas was just a tiny baby and couldn’t speak words, I would tell him, “I love you!”  One day I was standing him up on the kitchen cabinet and telling him that I loved him and he said “I aau  oou.”  He was telling me that he loved me!  That was the best feeling I’ve ever had in my life!

That’s just how God feels about us when we tell Him that we love Him.  He is thrilled.  He wants to hear that from us.  But He also wants us to know that He loves us.  The realization of how much I loved my new born son allowed me to understand just how much God loves me…His child.  And…the truth of the matter is…He loves us more that that!  His love is immeasurable and unconditional.  Until that moment, I didn’t get it!

In the Bible, John said that he was the disciple whom Jesus loved.  He got it!  No…it wasn’t arrogance on his part.  He simply knew that he was loved by God.  The beauty of it is that He loves us all the same!

We love Him because He first loved us.   1 John 4:19

My prayer is that we all attempt to grasp just how much God loves us and that our understanding of how much He loves us grows and deepens daily.  Just knowing that He loves me and wants the best for me causes me to love Him that much more.  What an awesome God we serve!!

If you find yourself without...

I just hate being misunderstood…but, in all reality, who doesn’t!?!

That’s why I’m so grateful that I can tell my Heavenly Father everything, without holding back, and know without a shadow of doubt that He understands exactly what I’m feeling and going through. 

Jesus said that he had to go from this earth, but when he did, he would send us a Helper…the Holy Spirit.   John 16:7   I just love this!!  How wonderful it is that the Holy Spirit is with us always?!  He will comfort us when needed, give us wisdom when needed, open our eyes and ears when needed, etc.   We don’t have to be at church to ask for help from Him.  He is with us always.  We only need to realize it.  Twenty-some years ago, I found myself at the grocery store and realized that I had forgotten my list.  I decided to put this to the test.  I prayed that the Holy Spirit would bring to my memory everything I had placed on my list.  I continued my shopping and when I got home, I found that everything on that list had been brought to my memory while shopping. 

With that said, our Helper is always with us.  It’s been my experience that it’s very challenging to find someone who will actually listen to what I’m saying…especially without interjecting their two cents worth! (See “To Speak or Not To Speak!”)  That’s not so with the Holy Spirit.  He listens and takes action on our behalf, whatever the situation may be.

If you find yourself without anyone safe to share what’s going on in your life…you’re not alone.  The Holy Spirit is always there for us no matter what time of day or night.  He always understands exactly what we’re going through…no matter what it may be.  Put your trust in the God of the Universe.  He will never fail you!!

Don't assume that you know...

Don’t assume that you know the reason why you see what you “see” in others.

Recently, I’ve been in a situation where I’ve been able to observe the behavior of several different people in a particular setting.  In honesty, I really don’t understand this behavior and have asked God to give me wisdom, understanding and discernment.  It’s a situation where, if I allowed myself, it would be very easy to pass judgment.  But every time that temptation comes up, I ask God to give me the strength to overcome it…He has been SO faithful.

So, as the months have gone by and I have continually observed, one thing God has brought to light for me is that one of these folks is very ill.  To look at her, one would think that all is well.  But in reality, she revealed to me that the doctors have told her that she has only a few years to live.  Needless to say, that hit me like a ton of bricks!!  Knowing this, I totally understand her behavior.  Before knowing this info…it was difficult to understand. 

For many years now, due to my own highly dysfunctional background, it’s been important for me to get to know other people’s story.  Knowing someone else’s story can give insight as to why people do what they do…why they react the way they do and so on.

I can say from experience, it’s no fun when others choose to judge by their own experiences instead of the experiences of the one they’re judging!!

Everyone has a story.  Get to know their story and Heaven forbid…don’t set yourself above them!  Let’s pray that we will love the way Jesus loves!!  J

When you find yourself in a sticky situation...

Quite some time ago, I had a conversation with someone who was having a difficult time with family members.  It was an emotional time for my friend.  In this emotional state they began to speak about the situation coming up with the family members in a negative way…claiming that the situation was going to blow up into an argument.  It was obvious that there were already hard feelings there.  I told this person that the situation didn’t need to blow up and it would and could blow up only if they wanted and allowed it to.

You see, we cannot control what other people do, but we can control what we do and how we react to what others do.  If we know that a situation is volatile(or and situation for that fact!), that’s when we should take it to the Lord in prayer.

PRAYER CHANGES THINGS!!

We have different choices that we can make in situations like this.  We can take it into our own hands doing any number of things…and more than likely make a mess of the entire situation, or we can give it to the Lord.  Giving it to the Lord is the best and wisest decision we can make.  And, when we take it to the Lord, of course this fleshly body that we’re in usually wants what it wants when it wants it.  We need to remember that we should always ask for God’s will and not our own.  We may think that we know exactly what needs to be done in a given situation.  But in reality, God is the only One who can see the big picture.

When you find yourself in a sticky situation, remember to take it to the Lord and trust that He will work all things out for the good.  In my friends’ situation, I believe that’s exactly what they did.  I found out later that everything went swimmingly.

Trust God…He has our best interests at heart.    

So...I find myself frustrated with...

So...I find myself frustrated with others from time to time.  Then I ask myself, why?  Well, because they’re not doing what I think they should.  Hmmm…then I ask myself…what am I not doing that God wants me to do and is probably waiting for me to do?  Yikes!!  Hello!!

You know if we have given our lives to follow Jesus, we are all on a different place on the same path.  Just because we “get” or understand something now doesn’t mean that everyone else around us will get it at the same time we do.  In fact, if we’re honest with ourselves, we probably aren’t getting something that they understand. 

We’re all unique individuals and God has a time and place for understanding the things that He wants us to understand as individuals.  And…He is supremely patient in waiting for us to come to the understanding that He wants us to have.  Oh, how grateful I am for His grace and mercy for me!!

As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.  Proverbs 27:17 

We need to be who God made us to be and not compare ourselves to others…or hold them to our expectations!  As we interact with others, just simply being who we are in Christ will cause us to sharpen one another.  That’s the work of the Holy Spirit…not us.

So, cut yourself and others some slack.  Take care of yourself.  Focus on being who you are in Christ.  Leave the rest to God.  I’m sure He’s got it all under control!  J