Worst ... and the best!

August 12th, 2019 marked three years since I left to head to California for an internship at a church there. At the time when I left, my husband and I were on the same page … at least so I thought. When we were praying about this, the Lord gave me one word … “reset.” I believed that God was using this to reset our marriage, which was in definite need, even though we were on good terms when I left. This internship was a “miracle” for me … at least so I thought. Almost immediately, I realized that the internship was a flop, but both my husband and I heard from the Lord that I was to stay in California. The Lord told me that I would be as certain of the time to return as I was to go there. So, I stayed, in faith. I assure you, this was very difficult for me. God was stretching me like I had never been stretched before. The good from my six months in California is that I did hear the Lord to stay, and I had a wonderful opportunity to be a Christian witness to female refugees from Afghanistan. It was a wonderful experience that I still support and look back on as a win, win situation. The bad news that came was when I knew it was time to return to Arkansas. It didn’t happen at all the way I expected. My husband called me to tell me he was divorcing me. He had led me to believe that he was coming out west for a vacation. I was planning a vacation … he was planning a divorce. 

Well, I said it had been three years. A lot has happened in these three years. In all honesty, they have been the worst three years of my life … the worst … but yet, in some ways, the best. (Some days that’s difficult to say!)

You see a little over 25 years ago, I had packed my bags for myself and my baby son. I was going to leave my husband. I couldn’t take it any longer. He has what we now know to be Narcissistic Personality Disorder … among other things. Things were bad. I was not only a young mother, but a young Christian. I had everything packed in the car that I was planning on taking and headed back into the house to get my son to leave for good. On my walk inside to get my son I heard the Holy Spirit simply tell me to “stay.” I didn’t doubt at all what I heard. I chose obedience, unpacked the car, and stayed. It was years later before my husband ever knew that I had planned on leaving him.

The next nearly three decades were very difficult. It’s challenging for me to find good things throughout that time. It was like walking on eggshells every single day.

A few months before our son was born, the Lord impressed upon me to stay home with him … something that I had not planned on doing. I had a decent office job and had been offered a buyer’s position at a retailer upon my return to work. I turned down the job. I chose obedience. God used this time to stretch me. He showed me how to trust Him for finances now that we were a young family on one income. He showed me how to rely on Him to be a good wife and mom. And, He took this time to heal me from a challenging childhood. When my son was born, I was a baby Christian. I was insecure and had no self worth. I had been controlled by family members and then by a husband. God used this time to break those chains off of me and gave me a sense of self worth. He taught me who I am in Him … a child of the Most High God.

I can tell you those years were challenging … actually, more than challenging! Imperfectly, because no one is perfect, I did the best that I could. My husband travelled A LOT, so I pretty much raised our son by myself in his younger years. But, when he was in junior high my husband was home more. At that time I knew that the marriage was going down hill and pleaded with him for our relationship … to no avail. Please know that I don’t say these things with any harshness. I say it because it is simply the truth. (I will get to a point later in this blog.) And, numerous times over those many years, I would silently plead with God to let me go. Again, the answer was for me to stay. Since God told me to stay, I totally believed that He was going to heal and restore our marriage … completely. I say that with all sincerity! That never happened and it never will. Instead, things just kept getting worse and worse, especially after our son graduated from high school. What I was fighting against all those years ago when my son was in junior high totally unfolded before my eyes over the next several years.

So three years ago, due to the leading of the Lord, I went to California. My husband called and said he was divorcing me. At the end of that phone call, God gave me the sign that ensured that it was time to go back to Arkansas. The divorce happened very quickly! But, I knew that God had ordained this. NO … God hates divorce, don’t get me wrong. (Malachi 2:16) This is why He had me stay for so long. God DID want to restore our marriage, but it takes two dedicated people. The divorce didn’t come from me. It came from my now ex-husband. And, it has been one of those terrible divorces that you hear about or see in a TV program on the Lifetime network. I assure you the last three years have been the worst of my life. I have endured things that I never could have dreamed up. (1 Corinthians 7:15)

I say all of this to tell you that even though they have been the worst years ever … at the same time … in some miraculous ways … they have been the best. 

Choosing to be a stay at home wife/mom all those years ago, left me with little to no paid work experience, but that has been God’s plan all along. You see, I’ve been working forward to ministry … advancing God’s Kingdom … which is why this road has been so challenging. God has used this time to stretch my trust, my faith, and my belief in Him. He has taken me from one experience to another over the past several years by the leading of the Holy Spirit. This has not been easy. It’s been far from a “walk in the park.” 

But God … 

His ways are not like our ways. (Isaiah 55:8-9)

I have been divorced for a little over two years now, but am still not totally free from all ties with my ex-husband. When I left California, I was in a situation where I was going to be put out with little to nothing as quickly as possible. I had no idea what I was going to do. But you see, God wasn’t surprised by any of this … not at all. He already had a plan and I assure you it has not gone anything like I thought it would. (Jeremiah 29:11)  What and how the enemy was trying to do me in has not and will not come to pass! (Isaiah 54:17) God has kept me in the house that my ex-husband and I own together for the past two and and a half years without any money out of my pocket … zero, nada! God has also seen to it that I have money to live on … not a lot, but all my needs are met. He has exceeded my dreams so far by allowing me not one, but two trips to Australia for worship conferences there … everything totally paid, 100%! He has increased my profit from the selling of this house … no matter what it sells for! He has taken care of the severe carpal tunnel syndrome that I had in both hands for many, many years with surgery a year ago. Most importantly, he is healing the trauma of the past three decades. I could go on and on. (Philippians 4:19) I am totally bragging on God because He deserves it! 

Now, I’d like to tell you that I have sailed through this with perfect faith, trust, and belief in God … but, I’d be lying to you if I did. I can tell you that there have been plenty of days that I thought I would “throw in the towel” for ministry just to get some of the pressure off. But, deep down, I knew that I would be making a tremendous mistake if I did. In fact, I have struggled with trusting God at times. I have struggled with faith at times in knowing that all things will work out for the good for those who love God. (Romans 8:28) I have said, “God, I believe you, but help my unbelief,” very, very often. (Mark 9:24) This has not been an easy road and I will not play it down and pretend that it has been. I’m not perfect. And, don’t believe anyone who leads you to believe that they are, either! 

Deep down, I know that God did not have me go through three decades of troubling times (in marriage alone, not including my childhood) just to lead me to more troubling times. God will not do that. It’s not in His character. (Numbers 23:19) I may have struggled through the past three plus years in this stretching and growing process, but God sees my heart. (1 Samuel 16:7) That first year that I stayed home with my son, I laid myself prostrate on the floor and told God that I was a woman after His heart. (1 Samuel 13:14) And, I still do that from time to time … to remind myself. God believed me and is holding me to it … hallelujah!

So yes … these have been the worst three years of my life. But … they have been the best in a lot of ways. God has, even long before the divorce, given me glimpses of the future. He has given me glimpses of the future during these three years. He will not lead me astray, let me down, leave me, or forsake me … or you! (Proverbs 3:5-6, Deuteronomy 31:6)

It is so exciting to know that life is going to be different soon. Troubles or trying times will never go away completely as long as we’re this side of Heaven. (John 16:33) But, I know that I know that it is going to be good … soon.

Worst … and the best.   

Fake it till you make ... or something like that!

Have you heard the term, ”Fake it until you make it?" Or better yet, maybe you’ve heard, ”Step out in faith for what you're believing God for.”

Over the past several years, life has been challenging ... well, for those who know me well,  they know it's been quite a bit more than challenging for me.  Currently, I seem to be at a point where I'm "waiting" or in a "holding pattern."  In this time while waiting for my house to sell, rather that choosing depression, defeat, or doubt, I have chosen to move in faith for a few of the things I'm waiting on God for.  I chose to move in faith, not because I think I'm some great person, or that I’m entitled.  I have chosen to do certain things simply because it is an act of faith.

I began, in faith, packing everything in my house.  I have prayerfully made choices about things I will and will not keep.  Has my house sold yet? No, it hasn’t.  But, that doesn’t matter.  I chose to do this in faith.  Is there anything wrong with acting in faith.  No, there isn’t.  I believe that’s why it’s called faith.

I also began practicing my guitar and voice for something that I hope God will do in my life … again … in faith.  I think what bothers me the most is that I have been told that “I must think that I’m going to just show up and be put center stage.”  I couldn’t believe my ears.  I actually find this rather disturbing … and most definitely from the enemy!!  If we are to move in faith, doesn’t that mean that we’re trusting God, and not men, to move on our behalf? Either He’ll choose to move on our behalf or He won’t.  Ultimately, it’s up to Him.  Why then, would a Christian community choose to believe that a move like this on my part is arrogance or entitlement?  I don’t actually believe that I’m entitled to anything … other than what God, Himself, has ordained for my life.  Is it arrogance to believe for what I believe God has for me?  I actually thought that was called faith.   ~ Selah

When I saw … or rather, heard these things … I chose to be silent.  I stood on Exodus 14:14, which I’ve been doing a lot lately. “The LORD will fight for you, you need only be still.” This is not a battle that can be won in the physical.  This is a battle for God to fight in the spiritual.  And, quite frankly, whether a physical or a spiritual battle, I find that God is much more able to accomplish what He wants for my life much better than I can fight for myself.  I implore you to do the same if you find yourself in the same or similar battle. (which is the reason for this blog)

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit.  Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interest, but each of you towards the interests of the others.”  Philippians 2:3-4  We’re to work together as a team for the advancement of God’s Kingdom, not thinking of ourselves more highly than another. ~ Selah

I do believe I’ll leave it right here and let the Holy Spirit “do His thang.”

Like the wise man Forrest Gump once said, “That’s all I’ve got to say about that.”

Take care and God bless … angie   

Worth more than many sparrows ...

So, this morning after I had spent time with the Lord, praying, reading, and thinking, I went downstairs for another cup o’ Joe. I was thinking of my next task ... a scripture - picture, which I create quite often. In my head I asked the Lord what He wanted to create through me today. Immediately, my eyes were drawn to a single sparrow on a branch in my back yard. My mind was then drawn to a moment when I was in Australia.  My trip there was nothing short of miraculous. I had known for nearly 9 years that I was to go there. I hadn’t given up, but at times, I had grown a bit weary wondering if I had truly heard the Lord correctly in this … ya know in my human-ness! 

Well, last December, I was in my fourth month of living in California. The Lord had called me, much to my surprise, to an internship at a church in CA that then led to a Christian program where I assisted in teaching Afghan women refugees how to speak English. While I was there, I heard the announcement of a worship conference/gathering at HopeUC church on the CentralCoast in AU.  I began to pray about going.  Little did I know that in early February my husband of 27 years would call me to say he was divorcing me. I had wanted to go back to Arkansas.  I was all alone in CA … in the desert, so to speak. The Lord had said that I would be as certain as to the time to go back to Arkansas as I was when I went to California. Oh, how true that statement was!

I say all of this to brag on God.  Of course, He returned me safely back to Arkansas ... I was a wreck, and CA to AR is a long drive!

I made it back, and with no money and no job, He supplied every dime I needed for an attorney ... more than just a couple thousand dollars ... all within 4 weeks to the day I stepped back on Arkansas soil.  I was amazed!  I began to believe that I could actually attend the conference. I put my trust in Him, and sure enough He, again, supplied every dime I needed for that, as well.

I had planned my trip well, so I thought.  In my planning, I had mistakenly thought that I could walk to the church from my hotel.  Oh how wrong I was … and I think of myself as a pretty good planner!! :)  But again, there was God! He had seen my error in my planning ... and He was ready with a plan!  Sure, I could have taken a cab everywhere I went. That was my plan “B.”  God’s plan was better. He led me directly to a church member at HopeUC, seemingly randomly (of course, nothing is ever random) …  a little more than 24 hours after stepping on Aussie soil.  This kind elderly gentleman offered to “be a taxi” of sorts, kindly taking me to and from church and then also showing me some of the beautiful sights around the vicinity. Of course, I could have hired a driver, but God placed this gentleman in my path. He was/is a wonderful person whom I still communicate with. He’s like a father figure type of friend.  Isn’t God amazing?!?

So, the first day of the conference, I was moving a chair to sit with some incredibly friendly folks and a cute little sparrow flew right in front of me. It was like time stood still. In that seemingly long moment, that realistically lasted only a second, the Lord reminded me of how He takes care of the sparrow. He reminded me of my value and worth compared to it. My heart (and eyes) swelled as I was overwhelmed with His goodness.

God’s ways are not always our ways. If He’s said this once, He’s said it a couple hundred times in the past twenty months alone!! And, even when we pray, plan, and put things into His mighty hands, we do sometimes get it wrong. But God!  As long as we put our trust in Him and keep our hearts pure, He is there with a plan.  It may take longer than we expect, but God’s timing is perfect.  Habakkuk 2:3

So … as you continue on this journey of life, remember; “Don’t be afraid. You are worth more than many sparrows.” Matthew 10:31 God is with us always and forever … for those who call on Him. Psalm 145:18

Giving birth...ouch!

 At the beginning of this year while in prayer, the Lord told me that the next nine months or so were going to be challenging and the road was going to be steep.  But, thankfully, He also told me that I would make it through it.  Now, you might be thinking, “Of course you’re going to make it through.”  At least that’s what goes through my mind when I wrote it. LOL!!  I have to say that I am very grateful the way He encouraged me, revealing to me that I would make it through.  It’s mid July and I’m not quite through the (minimum) nine challenging months.  In all honesty, this has probably been the most challenging time I have experienced in my life, seriously.  Oh how grateful I am that God is not only faithful to warn me about this, but encouraged me that I will make it through.  Because He knows the beginning from the end, I believe that He knew that I would need this encouragement or that I would quit and walk away from what I believe to be my life’s calling in Him.  Even knowing what I know, quitting has crossed my mind more than once since January.

 

So far since January, I’ve been told that I’m not a Proverbs 31 woman, that I’m hated by all of my family, that all I care about is myself, that I don’t hear from the Lord, that my vehicle purchase was vanity and not a blessing from the Lord…just to name a few things.  In the midst of a seemingly never ending battle to help someone I love to overcome narcissism, I’ve been accused of not handling things the way one person thinks I should handle them.  This person’s age in years is fewer than the number of years I’ve been married.  They have also known me for about one minute of my life, as well, by the way.  If you’ve never been in an intimate relationship with a narcissist, all I can say is that you have no idea how challenging it is…no…idea!!  I don’t say that to defend myself, because even though I know that I know that I know that I’m not a perfect person, in which we all are imperfect, I know that I know that I know that I am exactly where God wants me, doing, to the best of my God given ability, all that He wants me to do concerning this situation.  God wants freedom for the narcissist as much as any other person.  (What I have learned about most situations concerning a narcissist is that most people abandon the narcissist deeming them too difficult for the Lord to heal.  I refuse to believe such nonsense! Jesus has overcome everything!!)

 

I, unfortunately, can now say that I have been abandoned and / or rejected by every family member and / or friend in one way, shape, or form.  Even so…I know who I am in Christ.  Now, I don’t say all of this to get sympathy or kudos, to pat myself on the back, or anything of the sort.  I just want to say, “Thank You, Jesus…I’m still standing!!”  Hallelujah!!  I’m standing because and only because of what Jesus provided for me at the cross to be more than a conqueror!!  Romans 8:31-39

 

I know that I know that I know that I will make it through what seems to be a birthing process.  What He plans to birth, I’m uncertain.  But, I do know that He has asked me what my hearts desires are more than once over the course of several years and then recently told me that He is going to grant them.  I trust Him.  His timing is perfect.

 

His ways are not like our ways.  If He allows challenging times, it’s because He can see the other side of the challenging time and knows that the outcome will work for our good.  He has brought me to a place of seemingly nothingness.  I am encouraged because I know that He loves to work miracles from seemingly impossible places.  That way it is seen that it is Him…and Him alone who has brought about a miracle!!  Hallelujah!!

 

He told me that this season would be challenging.  He, of course, speaks the truth.  He is truth.  Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life.  No one comes to the Father except through me.  John 14:6  But not only does He speak only the truth.  He is faithful!  God is not a man, that He should lie, nor a son of man that He should repent.  Has He said, and will He not do?  Or has He spoken, and will He not make it good?  Numbers 23:19

 

So, I share these scandalous, challenging situations not to expose myself or anyone else.  I share them to be transparent because I know that I’m not the only person who is going through challenging times.  I know that I’m not the only person who sometimes wakes up in the morning and finds it hard to want to get out of bed and keep on keepin’ on.  We all have these moments.  I want to encourage you to keep on keepin’ on.  Put your trust in the Lord.

 

Although I can see some of the reasons why God has brought me on this route, I don’t fully know why He has brought me this route.  It’s not for me to figure out, but rather, to walk out.  But, what I do know is that He has shown me that He truly is the only One I can fully trust.  He is the only One I can fully rely on…Him and Him alone.  Man, whether they want to or not, intend to or not, will fail you.  Myself…I will fail people even though I truly would never intentionally want to fail someone.  We are human…imperfect humans.  We will make mistakes.  It’s not a matter of if, but when.

Don’t hold someone to standards that are impossible for them to keep.  Just don’t do it!  Life is hard enough.  Love God, love people.  That’s what matters.  If you don’t have discernment for certain situations, ask God for it.  God wants us to have wisdom about challenging situations in our lives.  James 1:5   If you find yourself lacking compassion in certain situations, ask God for it.  He has compassion for all situations because He has experienced everything every man could ever experience.  He has the compassion.  He will show us the way and you must choose it.  Hebrews 4:15


Yes, this has been a challenging season so far.  But, I can now look back over the course of many, many years and see that He has used challenging situations to grow me, strengthen me, and stretch me.  Without these trying times, we cannot be all that He created us to be.  It also costs us something.  We must choose to go through challenging times.  God never ever said that life in Him would be easy.  2 Timothy 3:12  But one thing I know is that it is truly worth it.  To know that I’m loved by the Creator of the Universe is enough.  He loved me first…and always.  1 John 4:19,  Ephesians 1:4

 

I also know that He will use these challenging situations so that I am equipped to help others.  He raises us up to be able to help others, so that they can help others…and on and on and on.  It’s about advancing the Kingdom of God in a world of darkness.

 

Trust Him through the process.  He is faithful.   

Trust God!

Back in 2010, I found it necessary to get a paying job outside the home.  Due to the economic collapse in 2008, the company David works for had massive lay offs.  He managed to survive the layoffs, but had taken a thirty percent cut in pay.  In 2006 we had finished building a new home.  There were some odd things that took place with the builder and it left things financially challenging for us even before the cut in his pay.  I had been the manager for 45 vendors at our local farmers market during the summer of 2009, but circumstances caused me to want to look for employment elsewhere.  A friend of mine told me about a part-time job so I checked into it.  I passed the tests that were required and ended up getting the job.

 

At the time, I was having some extreme physical issues that would cause me to be very tired.  I also didn’t realize that I was a tactile learner then.  Being a tactile learner means that I learn by going through the processes.  To sit and listen for hours on end is very challenging for me.  It’s actually better for me if you just throw me in the thick of things.  I may be in over my head at first, but once I get it, I rise to the top and do extremely well.  I just know that’s how I function.   It’s how I was created.  Looking back to my elementary school days, I remember having issues with this.  But, in the early 70’s they taught one way and you learned one way.

 

So, the training process was a bit challenging for me, but I really liked what I was doing, so I stuck with it.  I would even tell my friends about the place when they were hiring.  The hours were good.  We’d usually work only 6 hours a week and the pay was pretty good considering it was part time.

When we were learning new things, I would raise my hand if I had questions, like the others did, but my questions would rarely ever get answered.  I didn’t understand this.  My boss would look right at me and then ignore me.  This was challenging.  Also, the hours would change weekly.  Sometimes we wouldn’t know until the day before that we would need to be at work.  They would call to let us know and then we would have to call to confirm if we found out via voice mail.  Often, I would call the office and no one would answer the phone.  This was frustrating for me because I was doing my best to follow their instructions.

 

One day I addressed the phone issue with my boss after they embarrassed me in front of the entire team of people that we worked with.  They did not like this.  In fact, they didn’t like it so much that they called me into the office to “straighten me out.”  I prayed silently as I awaited the boss’ presence.  I knew that I had done nothing wrong and I didn’t like getting pushed around and ignored.  I just wanted peace whatever the cost.  I had decided that I had been there for a few years and this treatment hadn’t stopped.  It was no longer worth the frustration that it was now causing.  I made up my mind that I would stand up for myself kindly, politely and respectfully when the boss came in and I didn’t care if they fired me.  It was all or nothing.

 

So, the boss came in and began raking me over the coals.  This person was bullying me and I went toe to toe with them.  During this conversation, I found out that they didn’t think that I even liked my job.  I explained to them just how wrong they were about me and how I always share with people the job openings and tell others how much I like the job.  I wouldn’t have stayed, if I didn’t like it.  The job itself was fun and interesting.  Now…they seemed shocked.  And then, this person began to just talk and ramble on…speaking out the truth of the situation which, through this process, they actually revealed aloud that I had done nothing wrong.  They had judged me wrongly.  Then came the “deer in the headlight” look.  This person then apologized to me and brought in another person and they also apologized to me.  We all talked for a moment and then they realized that they had been wrong about me for more than two years.

 

You see they had chosen to see me for something that I wasn’t…for whatever reason.  They made that decision and held it against me without taking the time to get to know who I really was.  They apparently didn’t understand that in spite of my extreme physical issues at the time, I was there, pushing through the discomfort and still managed to do my job well.  And, in spite of the challenges to learn the way things were taught, I still learned and succeeded.  This was their issue, not mine.  They saw their error, humbled themselves, apologized, and all was well.

 

I still work at this place.  I still enjoy working there and enjoy the many people who work there…nearly 7 years now.

 

The person who I had gone “toe to toe” with recently left our NW Arkansas location to open a location elsewhere.  Before they left, they approached me and we had a wonderful conversation.  All is well because of the mature way that this was handled after they found out the truth of who I truly was.  They had believed the lies the enemy was whispering in their ears and I was the victim.  But, God found it necessary to vindicate me. I trusted Him.  I put Him in charge and followed the leading of the Holy Spirit.

 

If I wasn’t a Christian, I wouldn’t have any understanding of what was happening in this situation.  But since I am, I get it.  You see, it’s not flesh and blood that we strive with.  Ephesians 6:12  It’s the enemy.  In the words of Jesus; “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy, I have come that they may have life and have it abundantly.”  John 10:10  I put this situation in God’s hands knowing that I didn’t do anything wrong.  Even If I had lost my job, I still knew that I had done nothing wrong.  Fortunately, my boss saw for themselves that I had done nothing wrong and they had held this against me for more than two years.  I’m grateful that I stood my ground in this situation.

 

God has called us to love others. 1 Corinthians 13 Often loving others means that we walk away silently, even when we know that we’ve done nothing wrong.  But, love is not a door mat.  Matthew 21:12-13, John 2:13-17  Love has safe boundaries.  Love is not a push over.  With that said, like in this situation, there’s nothing wrong with standing our ground.  I put the situation in God’s hands and He took care of it and brought the truth into the light.

 

We could call this situation a “holy discontent.” I have experienced many holy discontentments, but just recently learned a name for it.

 

When Jesus went into His Father’s house and saw them making it a den of thieves, it caused a holy discontent within Him.  It caused anger.  There’s nothing wrong with anger as long as we don’t sin in the process.  Human anger does not bring about the righteousness that God desires.  James 1:20  There’s nothing wrong with having a holy discontent, either.  It’s what we choose to do with it.

 

Jesus went and made a whip before He went back and drove the sellers out of the temple.  Making a whip takes time.  This situation wasn’t something that raised anger and just went away quickly.  This was something that needed to be dealt with.  Now Jesus never sinned.  He was angry and he drove the vendors out of the temple with a whip!!  In this situation, it wasn’t a sin.  He was doing the work of His Father.  John 5:19

 

Just like Jesus at the temple, we too, may experience a holy discontent from time to time.  We need to put whatever it is in the hands of our Heavenly Father.  He will show us what to do and when the time is right.  For me, two and a half years into the situation at my job was the right time to do something about it.  I put this situation in His hands and He brought good from it.  Romans 8:28  The key is knowing when to stay and when to walk.  And, the only way we will know is by being led by the Holy Spirit.  He will lead us if we allow Him to do so.  Galatians 5:16-18

 

Dealing with a holy discontentment may take some time and maybe even more time than we realize at first.  It will most likely make us uncomfortable, as well.  Don’t brush it off.  Go with it and trust God.  Put it in His capable hands and He will work it out.  Don’t take things into your own hands.  That will only cause problems.

 

Trust God!

...am I being obedient...

I’ve been calling our dog, Stewie, lately and he simply refuses to come to me until I am forced to get firm with him.  Only after I do get firm with him does he decide to obey and come to me.  I find this very frustrating.  I never had this much resistance from my son when he was growing up and it’s strange to have a dog that is so strong willed!

As this was taking place, I began to wonder; am I being obedient to all that the Lord is calling me to do?  Hmmm…when He calls my name, do I continue on with “the important stuff” that I’m doing or do I drop what I’m doing and do what the Lord is calling me to do?  This is something that I continually want to work on as a follower of Christ Jesus.  I don’t ever want to miss out on something that the Lord has for me…whether it is something fun or whether it’s something tedious and challenging.  I know and believe that no matter what the Lord calls me to do, it is something that is needed for me, first…secondly, possibly help for others, and thirdly…if He calls me to do something, I know that He will equip me to do the task at hand.    

I want my ears to be open to hear what the Lord is speaking to me.  I want eyes to see what the Lord wants me to see.  I want to have a heart that is receptive to what God is doing.  I want to be willing to do whatever it is he is calling me to do.  I actually focus on this as my lifestyle. 

So, when I see Stewie acting in this manner, it serves as a reminder for me to be attentive to what the Lord is doing in my life.  I encourage you to do the same.  Be attentive to what God is doing in your life.  Dare to believe that you can and will be all that God created you to be.  And, by being attentive and willing to obey, we can become and be just that.  Trust and believe in God and hope for the best.  He will never lead you astray!  Trust me, the road will not always be easy, but it will definitely be worth it.  He is faithful and worthy of everything that we have to offer to Him…am so much more!         

If you find yourself without...

I just hate being misunderstood…but, in all reality, who doesn’t!?!

That’s why I’m so grateful that I can tell my Heavenly Father everything, without holding back, and know without a shadow of doubt that He understands exactly what I’m feeling and going through. 

Jesus said that he had to go from this earth, but when he did, he would send us a Helper…the Holy Spirit.   John 16:7   I just love this!!  How wonderful it is that the Holy Spirit is with us always?!  He will comfort us when needed, give us wisdom when needed, open our eyes and ears when needed, etc.   We don’t have to be at church to ask for help from Him.  He is with us always.  We only need to realize it.  Twenty-some years ago, I found myself at the grocery store and realized that I had forgotten my list.  I decided to put this to the test.  I prayed that the Holy Spirit would bring to my memory everything I had placed on my list.  I continued my shopping and when I got home, I found that everything on that list had been brought to my memory while shopping. 

With that said, our Helper is always with us.  It’s been my experience that it’s very challenging to find someone who will actually listen to what I’m saying…especially without interjecting their two cents worth! (See “To Speak or Not To Speak!”)  That’s not so with the Holy Spirit.  He listens and takes action on our behalf, whatever the situation may be.

If you find yourself without anyone safe to share what’s going on in your life…you’re not alone.  The Holy Spirit is always there for us no matter what time of day or night.  He always understands exactly what we’re going through…no matter what it may be.  Put your trust in the God of the Universe.  He will never fail you!!

When you find yourself in a sticky situation...

Quite some time ago, I had a conversation with someone who was having a difficult time with family members.  It was an emotional time for my friend.  In this emotional state they began to speak about the situation coming up with the family members in a negative way…claiming that the situation was going to blow up into an argument.  It was obvious that there were already hard feelings there.  I told this person that the situation didn’t need to blow up and it would and could blow up only if they wanted and allowed it to.

You see, we cannot control what other people do, but we can control what we do and how we react to what others do.  If we know that a situation is volatile(or and situation for that fact!), that’s when we should take it to the Lord in prayer.

PRAYER CHANGES THINGS!!

We have different choices that we can make in situations like this.  We can take it into our own hands doing any number of things…and more than likely make a mess of the entire situation, or we can give it to the Lord.  Giving it to the Lord is the best and wisest decision we can make.  And, when we take it to the Lord, of course this fleshly body that we’re in usually wants what it wants when it wants it.  We need to remember that we should always ask for God’s will and not our own.  We may think that we know exactly what needs to be done in a given situation.  But in reality, God is the only One who can see the big picture.

When you find yourself in a sticky situation, remember to take it to the Lord and trust that He will work all things out for the good.  In my friends’ situation, I believe that’s exactly what they did.  I found out later that everything went swimmingly.

Trust God…He has our best interests at heart.    

With authority comes the need for...

With authority comes the need for accountability.  With popularity comes the need for humility.  With prosperity comes the need for integrity.  ~ Charles Swindoll 

Have you ever worked for someone who has authority but chooses to not be accountable to anyone?  Maybe you’ve seen someone whose popularity went to their head and they became very arrogant?  Then there are those who you’ve probably seen who quickly become wealthy and then become ruthless because of it.  ALL of these situations will lead to a fall.

Use wisdom when authority, popularity and prosperity come your way.  But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.  James 1:5

God loves us and wants the absolute best for each and every one of us every moment of our every day.  When…not if… we need wisdom, we only need to ask God for it.  He will not fail us or mislead us.  He IS faithful!  Put your trust in Him and believe!

Keep your confidence in...

There’s a difference between being arrogant and having total confidence in God and what He’s doing in your life.  Sometimes those who don’t understand God’s ways, don’t understand the difference.  Don’t let the opinion of naysayers change your level of confidence / faith / trust in God simply because they criticize you or don’t understand.

 

The dreams of your heart are there because God placed them there.  No one else can tell you what God will or won’t do in your life.  It’s been my experience that those who cannot get behind me and my dreams are those who are either unhappy with themselves, jealous...or both.

Be cautious who you allow to influence you.  Keep your confidence in God, not in self or others.  Look to Him…not to the right or the left.  It’s amazing what God will do when we keep our eyes on Him and totally put our trust in Him.