Many years ago, around 2003-04, my life was an absolute mess. I didn't really know what was happening. I was depressed. I had terrible anxiety ... and I didn't even know why. All I could do was cry out to God. I didn't have the support of family. As far as friends were concerned, I didn't have any that really cared about what I was going through. I WAS ALONE ... as far as humans were concerned. God was always there ... even when He didn't seem near.
As I sought the Lord and even some counseling, I began to realize what had happened in my childhood that God was healing me of. There were many things that I never even realized. My eyes were blinded to some things, and others I had deliberately buried. I had never been taught how to deal with things properly. BUT GOD!! He sees all. He knows all. He IS in control of all things. And, He chose this time in my life to reveal to me what had happened that I just didn't understand ... and began the healing process.
I had closed myself off from everyone. I would literally strengthen myself to pick Nicholas up from school. I would do everything I could to be a loving, caring, and nurturing mom. There was no reason for my son to suffer for my own misfortune as a child. I wouldn't have it!
The summer before his 4th grade year, I felt led of the Lord to begin selling my pepper jelly at the Farmer's Market in Bentonville. I went to the market, found a place to set up, and found myself next to the loveliest of couples ... Tom and Mary. This too, was their first time at selling things at the Farmer's Market. Instantly, we became the best of friends. They were wonderful Christians who loved me for who I was. Long before I ever confessed to them how I felt, they were like the mom and dad that I needed in my life. Eventually, they would tell people that I was their "adopted daughter." (They actually have five daughters of their own!)
Fast forward to 2017 ... a few years ago, Tom went on to be with the Lord. Mary and I still talk. She is like a mom to me. I love her dearly. She has been a rock to me over the past several months, but especially the past couple of weeks.
I say all of this, not to place Tom and Mary on a pedestal, but to give God praise! He knew that I needed them in my life and they needed me. Sometimes I don't really "feel" like I do as much for Mary as she does for me, but somehow it all works out. God crosses the paths of people to help each other out as He works out His purposes in our lives. We may or may not see it at the time ... or even later. But, He works all things for the good for those who love Him.
I can say that I'm grateful for the things that God worked out in my life at that time, as difficult as it was. Those things He brought to light and healed me of has enabled me to help many others since then. And, although I am going through a difficult time now, I can say that I am grateful for it ... because I know that He will bring good from it ... and eventually bring me to a point of helping others in my same situation.
This Thanksgiving Eve, I just ended a call with my spiritual mom, Mary, whom I am eternally grateful for. Her 88 years on this earth has given her much wisdom. I am grateful to be someone who is able to glean wisdom from her life.
What or whom are you grateful for this holiday season? Don't overlook the small details. I assure you, if you look closely, you'll see the fingerprint of God on it.
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone ... God bless! 
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